I know. I haven't posted a blog since November. Due to new updates/upgrades on BlogTalkRadio, I was forced to quit my radio show. It still feels weird to not be hosting segments anymore, but at least I got/get to use my free time better. I don't know when it will happen. I have a good feeling, though, that by the end of the year, I will be uploading podcasts of my radio show onto my main YouTube channel.
That's right! I don't know if I told you this. I now have TWO YouTube channels. Wait, wait, wait. Stop it, Rabbit. You did not start this blog to talk about your social platforms. Take a breath, let it out, and start over.
Hi, my Hopefuls! :) I know it's been a long time. A lot has happened. I finally quit my job and am searching for a better one. Or at least - a job where teamwork and communication is stronger than my last job. Geez! Anyways...
In December, I had my first argument with my best friend. Well, our first argument about our relationship, I should say. I'm not going into details, but we ended up agreeing to downgrade as friends. It still feels wrong to call her a "friend." She's been my best friend since college, and she always will be.
Today, around 4am, she messaged me about her side of the relationship. For about thirty minutes, I seriously thought she was leaving me. She didn't say she wanted to part, but I could somehow see it in the wording. I cried. For a good amount, I cried. It made me realize how important she is in my life, and how drastic my life would seriously change if she left. I then poured my heart out to her. I confessed how much she means to me. That the problems and worries she has of her side of the relationship she doesn't need to work on by herself.
My college best friend has changed so much. She noticed a lot of her flaws over the years. She tries so hard to fix them and improve herself. Many times, I thought she was avoiding me. (She actually confirmed that in the convo.) And ever since our argument, it felt like she didn't want me at all. Far from it!
It turned out she was protecting me from the mistakes she thought I was making. Perhaps so, but I've tried so hard to hang out with her. I learned myself that I build walls between the people I like. But she is someone I love! If I ever did that, I would lose the last person I confess my secrets. I would lose the only person outside of my family I vent to. After our conversation, I realized we mended our broken hearts of each other. It makes me so happy! So here, on this blog, I will confess something, and I hope she sees it. Cause this secret is of her.
Whether it be friends, best friends, girlfriends, or lovers, I love you, my sweet, beautiful college buddy, forever and ever. And that will never change!